WildernessPunk – Page 9 – WildernessPunk

Homeless

I think there comes a time in every survivalist, nature poet, mountain man, and off the grider, where they wake up and contemplate whether what they’re doing is as good as it gets or if they are just another homeless loser. It doesn’t help that you could probably be quite a few of those things, pro and con, listed above all at the same time.

tree-fall-down

There is also a tipping point where friends, allies, and family are happy to be part of the adventure, but then begin to wonder how far one will take things. I’ve been beyond blessed over the last few months, but there’s a time the worrying begins.

worried_by_arrrkal-d6rtf02

WildernessPunk along with many other more natural pursuits, tend to challenge the status quo, also known as a person’s Cultural World View. CWV is, in as few words as possible, the way a person puts together their world. They create a framework of what is normal, right and wrong, fun and boring. It is a belief system. Opinions can be shared, many of us agree on certain issues, but like the whirling ball of chaos we all are, rare will we find a person who agrees on all our beliefs. Hell, if I get over 50% I know I’ve found a friend.

This could make me a harder person to spend time with right now. I’m just walking down a dirt road while others rip by me in their cars. This also means my current lifestyle confronts others, who are remaining within a system which most of us hate. I find I have a little awkwardness with some people as well. I didn’t have to wake up this morning and deal with an annoying supervisor and repeat some task I’ve already done a few thousand times. I’m not taking care of anyone’s needs either. I mean hey, I do things to help people all the time, but those are like giving gifts instead of often thankless routine.

Conversely, I’m living with less than anyone I spend time with. A LOT less. I have very little cash, I’m not eating as much as the average guy, and well, I have almost no possessions with me. I’m also riding my bike sometimes 20 miles a day. Networking. Writing. I feel a distance from the rest of the humans in many ways.

spider

Yet in other ways I’m closer to many of my friends than I have been in years. Certain barriers and obstacles are down. I feel free to be myself and with most of the people I spend time with, my new found time has renewed my life and I’m able to make stronger connections.

c1clouds

However, perhaps one of the biggest differences is the new Bell Curve of my life, which is alone versus diving into large social situations. Whether it has been family, friends, or events, I’ve been spending loads of time with others and having often more fun than I’ve had in long years. However, this is also tempered with whole periods of being alone. Sometimes I don’t see anyone for days. Even when I come into town, I will spend hours alone in some public spot writing.

I think this, at least for me, massive amounts of alone time also sets me off from most of the folks I know. In case you might not have realized, it’s an odd thing to spend two nights alone in the woods and then ride your bike 15 miles into town for a dinner party. It’s all good and fun, but those are harder gears to shift through than seeing half of the people all week at your job and then having a beer with them around the BBQ.

bike-bloody

So what am I bitching about? Isn’t this the exact principle WildernessPunk is based on. WildernessPunk: A man can survive and enjoy living in nature, but still be part of the e-world. Or more simply, a person could live in both worlds.

Let’s just say, I’m noticing the more challenging aspects. I think of such things as, “How different would it be if this was my land?” But again, that’s the first trap. Mine, not theirs. It’s the way of the predator.

WildernessPunk is the mouse.

And a mouse makes his own house. So a mouse is never homeless. And I brought a tortilla for Lucy so hopefully she won’t bug me tonight. Signing off from Cammmmmp 1

hurt

We got through another touchy subject, I promise to embrace Dionysus more next time so swing back by in a few days.

dionysus_bacchus_greek_god_art_11_by_valerhon

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sundown

Depression or not enough Wilderness in my Punk

Depression’s got a hold of Me

Depression, I got to break Free

Depression’s got a hold of Me

Depression’s gonna kill Me

Black Flag

Ergg, yeah sorry. Not the greatest title for getting people to dive into a post. Either you aren’t depressed so you don’t feel like being brought down, or you are depressed and don’t want to malinger on it. Still, guess what, it’s a situation which hits us all and I sure as hell won’t be discussing it while I’m in a good mood, so I should do it now and here I go.

I have worked in mental health for a few decades, so I know many of the paradigms and catch phrase out there. “You’re in charge of your own emotions. No one can make you feel bad but yourself…etc.” I could summarize other’s finding, but if you have read even a single post I’ve done you know that won’t be the case.

People that say you are 100% in charge of your own emotions are usually spoiled well off folks with advanced degrees living in suburbia or a gentrified city. Tell people in the middle east that have lived through years of bombing and lost loved ones they just need to get a better attitude and I’ll throw up. My point is exterior situations can be stressors. Hell, they can pound of you, sometimes even cripple us. So I’m not 100% buying we can completely control our own mindset. Or if maybe we can, some people have situations which could make it dozens if not hundreds of times harder.

half-life

I bring this to set the stage for the two types of depression I feel hit most people and these are Internal and External.

With Internal, sometimes it’s ourselves who become our worst enemy. This type of Depression is often a chemical imbalance, so it isn’t easy for the person to control. If your brain is not processing correctly, medications can often help. This isn’t to say shame, guilt, and self-loathing can’t be learned behaviors or the consequences of negative experiences had deeply scar a person’s self-worth.

The other type of Depression, External, is less likely to be chemical imbalance or something medications can help with. External is when the ills of life hit you hard. Usually people can handle an obstacle or two, but if they start to pile up, things grow harder. Turning in against yourself is a different feeling than having others turn against you. We all have a certain right to rail on ourselves, but that’s quite different than having someone else put us down or actively try to destroy parts of our lives.

Anger can be the first reaction, but if the problem can’t be solved with ease and helplessness/hopelessness sets in, then the anger sinks into Depression.

So I’m going to leave the Internal to the pros, grab your meds, Providers and make those pharmacies happy. I will, however, delve deeper into Exterior Depression. No, you don’t have an imbalance in your skull, and there was no horrid childhood leaving you traumatized. Instead you’re as normal as, well people can get, but the boogie man has come to call. Like Leatherface showing up at the family picnic, random misfortune, entropy, and humanistic bullshit is blasted at you.

I’m thinking I just experienced perhaps one of the worst weeks of in my life for a lot of reasons and I was arrested in Mexico once. Okay, that week was worse, but I possess more lingering issues this time.

camp-1-shadows

So blah, it happens to everyone. You can yap about it, but if you don’t want it, what do you do to get rid of it?

Being out here listening to the Coyotes sure as Yig helps. I think the real trick is to draw away. Exist in a place not dominated by people and thoughts. Find a free area (TAZ) to have for your own. Use your body to be a creature of action and test yourself. If that doesn’t work, wait until night, stare at the stars for a minute, take a deep breath and say, “fuck this imaginary bullshit I’m taking so seriously.”

I’m an animal, like any other on this planet. I can walk through the desert and I can sleep in the cold. I have traveled far and seen many things. Above all, people just do what they want. Life isn’t hard to understand when it comes to humans. They are just an army of chaos, each blitzkrieging toward imagined needs.

Think of things that bother you and your friends. How many of these issues even existed a 100 years ago. If the situation is more of an archetype such as a troubled marriage, or nasty job, how much of the methods we use deal with such situations has changed? I’m sure that people in 1816 thought they were being very progressive, but many of the things they did would land you in jail now.

great-depression-pictures

Times sway with the flow of humanistic perceived wants. God is dead, let’s replace him with laws because our endless spew of chaos will determine what is right, well for now, the gospel of today becomes a game show chuckle tomorrow.

Like, my anger, I think this has passed. I will return to the world of man/woman tomorrow cleansed and determined. In the end, life is simple. Just try your best. CKA and all that. I gotta kill a mosquito and set up my pallet. Signing off from Camp 1

rainbow

We got through Anger and Depression, things are looking up so swing back by in a few days.

david

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black-flag

Self-Censor of my WildernessPunk

I head out for my first official Fall camp. And yeah, it’s good ol’ Camp 1. Can’t knock it other than Lucy eating a few holes in one of my shirts. Bad, bad, camp rat. Kurt told me to kill you, but instead you get tortillas and still no gratitude.

camp-1-clouds

Windy with an edge of cold. Nature is asking, “You ready, —fill in the blank—

for this? What kind of jacket is that? Where is…?”

It will be down into the 30s tonight, but I shouldn’t have an issue. I’ve done what I could do to prep for this, but more gear could help. Still,,,wah, this is nothing, press on.

camp-writing-spot

I’ll head out of the forest and into the world of man for a book signing tomorrow. Wilderness–>Writer–>Humans–>$–>Hatch Chili Party. It should be my kind of day.

***

Things went well, sold a book every half hour. And managed to make it to the party a few hours before it got shut down.

book-signing

Today, however, not as smooth. I know I make it look easy, but this WildernessPunk thing isn’t the simplest thing in the world to pull off, but add onto this various trials and tribulations, and other random bullsh***************

(I’ve been told the following should not be posted at this time. I apologize for this and feel very sorry some of the teeth of this post were forced to be removed at this time. Yet within each conflict is a battle and there is no need to give the other side additional ammunition. I’m already screwed enough.)

So let’s post a happy picture instead.

morning-walk

(My advisors say it is safe to continue from here)

Can you tell I’m frustrated?

angry-croc

Yeah, I know, I need to relax and roll with it. As sated before, part of the thrill of WildernessPunk and life in general, is a level of challenge, conflict, and complication. If I didn’t have any of that, could I be a writer, would I deserve to write this blog? Most likely the answer to those questions would be… no. Challenge leads to strength. Conflict leads to perseverance. Complication leads to creative solutions.

So again I say, bring it on. We’ll see who wins. Alex Bone will give it. I’ve sure as hell taken it. So maybe it’s time to serpent up and see what I can make happen or maybe I’ll just have to move to Africa. I do like crocodiles.

happy-croc

Sorry I had to censor this post, but the reason I’m agitated is the reason I still need to watch my written word. I promise I’ll post it one day.

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camp-south

Resolution

Remember yesterday? Not yours, mine. Since then, 24 hours later, I’ve gone from being uncertain and insecure to determined. Even my spit of ill luck has washed away as our first Fall storm hits Flag. Funny how sometimes a person only needs a day to plan and plot, with a few conversations and some focused thought, things will often fall into place.

And yes, I have plotted my way into a plan and I feel damn good about it. Can I get a Hail Yig?

Some of the aspects of this undisclosed plan I find pleasing are:

It is challenging.
It involves spending time with good people.
Is endorsed by people I care about.
And best yet, should, if enacted correctly, will not only save me some significant money, but should keep WildernessPunk going, with a little love, to at least the end of 2016.

I could tell you this plan, but then you won’t be surprised and wouldn’t that suck? Is there anything I should/could tell you? What the hell, here’s a few teasers.

No permanent housing until 2017.
Besides some sleepovers, mostly camping until at least 10/20, which in Flagstaff will be no slacker feat.
No major traveling out of AZ until Thanksgiving.
Some butterflies and I are preparing to release about 6 of my novels in 2017.

Okay, enough of that. Thanks for allowing me to dig into the wells of egocentrism for a moment. So let’s contemplate the word Resolution. This word has two large and different meanings, but each of them are applicable to my current situation and most likely with yours as well.

cybercity2_shot36

Def 1: Resolution, to resolve a situation. As stated above, I feel like I’ve resolved much of my current life path. Hell, I got myself to 2017 and beyond. What might you need to do to plot out the rest of this year for yourself? Would it make your life easier if you gave yourself a few new goals or finished some old ones? What would you like to get finished in the next 14 weeks? How would you like to challenge yourself?

Def 2: Resolution, to commit yourself to an act, path, or change. For many people this is usually associated with New Year’s Resolutions. A personal pledge to oneself to make a change and bring your dedication to a path up a notch or ten. I suppose I made of few of those too. Chief being to keep WildernessPunk going well past the swells of snow.

Pardon my language, but life Fucks with your head. We all enjoy some level of security. As humans we enjoy warmth, food, predictably, income, a safe place to care for those we love… etc. Yet when we wake up in the middle of the night or have the quiet moment alone, we grasp for more. What might make us unique, what are our true dreams? Should you place your life on the table to make a crap roll for reaching the true vision of what your life could/should be? Most people don’t.

cybercity2_shot26

Sometimes they pick away at it from the side. Most of us have enough free time to dabble, but we have EXPECTATIONS. Society lays these on us. Family, friends, and enemies lay them on us too. Still the biggest always come from ourselves.

So how do we weight safely and security versus adventure and dream fulfillment? Another way to look at this is Law versus Chaos. What does it take for one to chance the Chaos? Pay off or disappointment, what will you find? What could you gain or lose? What will happen if you don’t toss that bet in and gamble a little?

poker

This also brings up the idea as to what do you really need in life? This country has its expectations and it will be happy to let you know what they are and it mostly boils down to the more the better, the bigger the better.

What about the mouse?

mouse

Maybe smaller is better. Can less be more. I bet the Earth wouldn’t argue with that. Remember if you are indecisive, just think, “What would Yig say?”

Do I need a two car garage, or a car for that matter? I’ve already traveled through 6 states this month without one. There is a certain satisfaction one gets from living with less. In the end, happiness is the key. If you’re happy where you are, then you might be doing well. If it isn’t broken and all that. But before I go, please also consider where your life is taking you and maybe your planet. When it comes to saving our world, more is worse, mice are nice, and the top 10% of the planet uses 50% of our resources. Now tuck yourself into bed and give yourself 24 hours before you map out your own Resolutions. And as Getty Lee says. “Even if you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”

geddy_lee_by_rushfan729

Swing back by to see how the chips fall as I dig in.

buttes

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half-off-pizza

I was feeling the hunger and a waitress just brought me a pizza without me asking for one and is giving me half off.

Fall… into WildernessPunk

It is 9/21/2016… and Fall has begun. With it comes uncertainty and with this comes the need for me to either figure out a way to seriously step up my game or make different choices.

fall

First Day of Fall in Flagstaff

I never intended WIldernessPunk to be merely a journal of my exploits and issues. My goal, as stated, was to really mix living within nature as much as possible (True Environment) with the juxtaposed concept of not only communicating my thoughts, findings, and adventures to the world online, but also making the money to survive through my writing and my online promotion business ShareStorm.

However, with Summer now over and me living at 7,200 feet in elevation, certain luxuries I’ve enjoyed will be quickly disappearing. Chief of these will be my ability to live with great levels of comfort in a minimalistic camp without a fire. I also have financial responsibilities which will be requiring me, should have been requiring me, to earn more of that elusive green.

paradise

If I wasn’t grounded into this reality, you would most likely see these posts fade into the mists of the web as I packed up a few belongings and set off on some questionable quest, such as walking from Flagstaff to Tucson heading through Payson, Roosevelt Lake, hitting Globe and then trudging down route 87 through the old mining towns. Damn, wouldn’t that be an epic journey. But it is one that won’t be happening. (Or most likely won’t be.)

Back to the seasons. This year has seen my life changed and defined by the seasons more than any year I have encountered. Winter = hardship within my long standing employment of over 13 years, but no serious changes in my long standing status quo. Shortly after spring began, 97% of what most people consider their ‘Life’ was removed from me with a single lie. The rest of the Spring proved difficult as I was monitored by the state until, quite literally the day Summer began. Summer found me more released from their erroneous bondage and I became in many respects freer than I’ve been since my freshman year in College. Yet this summer was divided between having housing, which once lost, begin this experience we call WildernessPunk.

electric-forest4

The Summer also became divided into what some might call bad luck vs. good luck or rough sailing vs. calm waters. I found it somewhat strange that my ill luck occurred before I moved out of my place and once I started WildernessPunk so many things fell into place, so close to perfectly, it made me nervous from time to time. Now, with abrupt timing, just as Autumn begins, some annoying complications have hit me. Again, I guess it’s back to the Real World.

Still, I have little to truly belly-ache about. Over the past seven weeks I have lived more and experienced more road trips and moments of bliss than some people get in a lifetime. Not matter what one might say, I’ve been a damn lucky guy.

I would like to point out that Wildernesspunk is certainly not over. If for no other reason than I’ll be staying in the wilderness for more than a while yet. Things could change, but they haven’t changed yet.

electric-tree-nicole-jean

One thing that has changed however, will be my touring around. After my last climax, which I just returned from, I’ll be buckling down in Arizona and as the weather increases so will my determination to ride this through.

Oh, you want to know about my last Climax, the finale of my blasts across the west? I’m not sure how much is proper to disclose. My E-Book training turned out to be informative, inspirational, and over all beyond enjoyable. A perfect way to end my longer trips. A butterfly in my stomach turned into a butterfly in my soul.

Now is perhaps a bit of a calm before the storm. I sit in Wheeler Park just west of downtown Flagstaff as the clouds roll in. A bluegrass band is practicing on the green. I have 5 hours until my class starts.

What do you think I should do first?

blue-grass

Thanks for your attention. I’ll be back at this soon. Tune back in to see what direction the Chaos tips.

chaos-strand

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Boneman

WildernessPunk, Anger

Anger, he smiles,
towering in shiny metallic purple armour
Queen Jealousy, envy waits behind him
Her fiery green gown sneers at the grassy ground

(Jimi Hendrix)

jimi

So now I head down to Phoenix, which is harder for a guy without a car. A 150 miles of heartless desert and with a heavy pack on my back I…okay I took the flipping shuttle. Sometimes the simple ways are best. More expensive, yeah, but at least I will be where I need to be, which for today is at my Photographer friend Kurt’s. I’ll be doing a Sharestorm follow up visit with him before I head of to more distant parts.

Kurt

But this brings me to the topic of this post. ANGER. Why am I taking the shuttle when I bought a new Forerunner straight of the showroom floor, back then I had sparkling credit? Why don’t I have sparkling credit for that matter? Why am I without the job I had with ripping benefits, why can’t I stay in the place I paid to upkeep for over ten years, and why am I not allowed to see my kids?

I bet you’re thinking I’m about to say that all this makes me angry. I suppose it does, but the reason I do not have these things is become someone else couldn’t control their anger. I suppose this is the wrong place to discuss this or is it. Let’s steer it away from my egocentric self, I think that will help.

What is anger all about? Step one, do animals feel anger? Have you ever seen a pissed off dog? Still if you kick a dog and it bites you, is this due to anger or is it due to an instinct for self-preservation? I’m not a biologist, but I think anger is felt by animals and might be a reaction to someone challenging an animal’s ability to survive. Humpback whales and dolphins have been discovered saving seals from Orcas. Perhaps one could argue that anger stems from self-preservation, but can become more defined as an emotion separate from the act of pour survival, which grows stronger the more mentally advanced a species becomes.

anger-ii

Humans have evolved into beings with complex emotions. Also, our needs, wants and desires are much further removed from basic survival. What was once a process to help physical preservation has now become a method for mostly social preservation.

The mother elk kicking the wolf away her calf is now the angry office worker badmouthing their co-worker behind their back, because of an ill perceived statement at the last staff meeting. I think an interesting issue to investigate would be if emotional anger has increased in cultures/areas where physical violence has become rarer. One could add the anger is now also much pettier. Getting mad at Ned for getting the promotion instead of you is a far cry from hating the invaders who killed your whole tribe while you were off hunting.

Leopold wolf pack hunting bull elk; Doug Smith; May 2007

However, the chance to defend your honor in any manner other than pissy words is dissipating. As the ability to smack an offensive knucklehead becomes increasing more difficult due to the state using any excuse it can think of to not only rob our wallet, but also steal any dignity we have left, we’re all required to be a bunch of belly aching angry wimps mulling over the minutia of other’s ill behaviors. Or maybe we don’t.

What’s my point? Anger has, over the past few decades, gone from a basic instinct of self-preservation to self-centeredness. Since we have five times as many cops as we could possibly need and cameras at every intersection, we have to bury our pride and listen to whatever bullshit any loser feels like spewing on us. My Viking ancestors are rolling in their grave.

anger

So what’s the answer? Just don’t play their game. Don’t get sucked into some petty, two faced, back stabbing, cry baby war of words. Most people live in a fantasy land of imagined wrongs based on man-made BS which didn’t even exist a few decades ago. Other things remain more constant like jealousy, gender based struggles for power and recognition, and competition for, well… everything.

Remember humans aren’t as important as we make ourselves out to be. We’re the animal that destroys the planet the best, whippidoo. Sure we have tech, art, and rise above the base, but can we breathe under water, spit venom, or fly? No, so relax a little.

Sometimes anger is right and justified. If someone tries to damage you and yours, they deserve a world of hurt. Otherwise, ignore the hater, these days they are most likely focused on human constructs which are half real at best, fade in an out of existence, and are based on ill-conceived ideals. So, rise above, screw the angry person and go take a walk in the woods, breath in a little True Environment, ground yourself, and realign your priorities.

We are in charge of our own emotions and life. Take responsibility for yourself and don’t let the words of anyone you don’t respect cause you to disrespect yourself. You’ll thank me later.

Did this post make you Angry? Don’t worry I’ll make it away from the cities and calm down soon.

Shadowbone

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Amy Face

Wind

Getting all my data, passwords, and such from Nicole’s laptop took longer than I had expected. I guess I got pretty busy with the laptop she loaned me for a 5.5 months. But now she’s gone, the farmer’s daughter has returned to the Indiana farm and I have one less pal in Flagtown. I probably won’t be making a bunch of new ones either hanging out here at Camp 1, but I did see some old friends at her little departure party.

clouds

I had intended to ninja into town to drop off her laptop, but ended up spending the night in Flag. Took care of some things I’ll either keep secret or not bore you with. I sit here within the wind. It has a slight chill, almost like a warning, ‘Summer is almost spent and Fall will lead to a brutal Winter. How do you expect to survive?’ It jokes at me like a playful siren, humor before hardship or is it humor in the hardship.

But things aren’t so drastic yet and I spit back at the winds and demand they keep their dances of gloom and doom to themselves.

sunset-writers-camp

Then a limping coyote walks by. It might be about the largest coyote I’ve ever seen. Tan, yellow, and light brown reflect off its fur. Yellow is the color of The Selectors in my novels, which are the viscous spirits who protect nature at all costs. I also found it odd the animal limped.

skinwalker_animation_by_celticmagician

This became even stranger, when I grabbed the camera to try to get a shot and the animal had already vanished.

I hesitate to write this, since I am within their territory, but the Dine have witches called Skinwalkers which assume the shape of coyotes, favor yellow, and tend to disappear at will. I haven’t had any trouble since it passed, but I’ll need to be vigilant tonight.

***

The day took an ominous turn as dark clouds moved in from the west while thunder vibrated the hills. I was in a bit of a funk before, but now I have a strange feeling of anticipation.

storm-clouds

I hadn’t expected rain, but it came anyway. Sort of an annoying, just wet enough to have to stash my things, but then it would stop. I’d take some wet things out to dry just to have it start raining again. Then the sun would come out and I’d try to work on my newest novel only to have to shut this laptop when the rain begun again.

storm-coming

But I have more exciting news. I have a pet of sorts. A huge desert rat is living in the roof of my shelter. Now I know why my sleeping bag was chewed open and where so many feathers went, the little turd. This isn’t some pet store rat. I’ll tell you that. She’s brown and mangy. We stared at each other for a long time when I lifted my camo-tarp to look for something. Then she ran off. I gave her some pizza. Maybe we can be friends and maybe she’ll be quieter at night and not bug me as much since I know where she lives, so if she messes with me, I could mess with her too.

lucy

***

Just a final note. There were no more Heebies Jeebies. A few elk walked through my camp in the morning and since I gave the rat two tortillas, she let me sleep through the night. Yes, I’m sure the little gal is a she and I’m going to name her Lucy after the dog I had as a kid growing up.

elk

Tune back in as I Do the Unexpected and Head out of Arizona Again. Or maybe you were expecting that.

apex-moon-clud

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breakfast-burrito-work-station-%ef%bb%bf

Camp 5, Road Tripping, and Saying Bye to my Short-lived Wheels

Okay, so this is by biggest break since starting WildernessPunk, but there was a good reason for this. Give me a moment and I’ll think one up.

Boneatah

When one has a ride all the time, you get comfortable and move at a different pace, but when one strangely has an unexpected ride, knowing you only have the vehicle for one more weekend sends the sparks flying and you have to determine what would be the best use of the ride over those days.

For me the obvious answer was… Tucson.

desert-ii

Let’s face the facts, this WildernessPunk thing I’m doing would not be for everyone and does not come without its challenges, but after all the hell I’ve recently endured, I have been embracing Dionysus over Apollo. Can this go on forever. Should it? Well yeah, but some pieces would have to fall into place very well and one can’t count on perfection giving you an O, so it’s more than a little possible, my life could change, I might have to start grinding and could have to obtain a rectangle of some sort.

Will WIldernessPunk continue? I’ll just have to see how it plays out, but I can tell you I won’t be talking about work and TV some day in the future and calling it WildernessPunk. Certain standards will be kept.

darkness

I was approaching a point and it was, since the cold cometh as well as other situations, I may not be able to continue with my WP ways forever, so it might be time to starting thinking about going out with a bang, reaching a climax, taking it home, and all that. Yellowstone is hard to beat, when discussing climaxes, but since I’m still going, I guess it wasn’t my climax. I might not know what it will be, however a trip to see my oldest friends and poker it up, with even me nerding out and running a first level D + D game was pretty dope. Cactus, poolside, friends, food, and just being a dork was damn fun. I’m so glad I headed down there.

castle

Sometimes the soul needs chaos, but the relaxing kind. Chaos doesn’t have to be a bouncing Duffy Duck, it can be chill and perhaps chilling in some luxury. Chaos often means you’re just putting yourself in a situation which doesn’t occur often and I don’t make it down there often enough, so there I went.

I might have one more climatic trick tucked away, but I will keep it hidden for now.

On the way down, I figured I’d move a few miles behind me before I set up my tent, so I gave a small tribute to my father by camping at the lonely old road called Dugus. My father had known Old Man Dugus. In some respects, I live in Arizona because my father took me out here when I was a kid because he used to spend his summers out in Dugus, with his park ranger uncle, when he was a kid.

dugus

My favorite story about was how Dugus used to catch gila monsters and fatten them up in a barrel, because for Dugus they were a well worth the wait and he considered their tails a delicacy. They were also live in garbage disposals. Camp 5 was nothing too fancy, but it put me an hour closer to my goal and provided me with a fog filled sunrise.

fog

I did manage to get out to the Sonoran Desert more this trip. Wooks and I set ourselves to hiking into the Tucson mountains. I thought we had an early start, but going from high elevation to low doesn’t make up for that pounding heat. Still since my Eternal Aftermath Series has many scenes which take place in this mountain range, the more exploration I can do to scout out for my novels the better.

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So after my last dose of out of town fun with my pals, I’m back up at Camp 1. The car is gone and so is the sun. I’ve got too many things to do to avoid heading into town. The Real World is nibbling at me, hovering around the edges. It will be interesting to so how quickly things might change and how long I can ride the WildernessPunk.

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Please swing back by and discover which path of Chaos my foot falls n next.

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Fear Based Folly Meets WildernessPunk

I ended up really liking Camp 4 and could see myself going back there. As anyone who has read even one of these WP can grok, I’m not a big fan of crowds, yet, when I am isolated, I’m not immune to the Heebie Jeebies and I’m not talking about my favorite Flagstaff band.

camp-4

I know this goes a little contrary to the ‘Leave All the People Behind,’ idea, but when I get into the burly regions where nature still rules, like I mentioned before, places close to their True Environment, I tend to feel a certain unease.

Thoreau didn’t have such concerns on Walden Pond. A trip and slip or a dash of frost bite might have been his chief concerns. The west is a different creature. I’m not saying animals rush you left and right, but in the wilds and alone, a person does take some risks.

waldon-pond

Yet, I’m thinking this improved vigilance is a good thing. I’m certainly not trying to suggest the hyper vigilance many children, urban dwellers, and some abused people worldwide are forced to deal with is a good thing. Never being able to relax leads to lives of woe. Yet vigilance in nature is another issue. Perhaps closer to being a solider than battered child.

You can train and be more prepared, similar to a warrior. You can have the right gear, like a soldier tries to insure, but when you are on your own, you can only look so many ways at once.

Sometimes your mind can play strange tricks on you. Movement, then nothing. I might need a haircut. Why does my swinging hair have to be the same color as a grizzly’s coat? Okay, a really dirty grizzly, but those are the worst kind.

camp-4-view

And there is that one in a hundred times an animal is there and suddenly you go from flipping a playing card to protecting your family.

But is this really what I’m talking about? It is not so much that you could have something happen as much as being ready for it. You feel a little more real checking your own trail for venomous vipers in order to take a leak than shuffling barefoot down a hallway for the 70,000th time.

Western Diamondback Rattlesnake

That is the difference between this type of survival and walking by a gang to get something for your mother. Perhaps the latter is far more intense, but something about removing other humans from the equation changes things.

Sorry if I offend anyone, but humans are mostly assholes. Many evolve above this state, but it’s our base selves and truly our animal self.

dumbies

We are smart enough to think past it, but it’s not a given. Animal State: Includes, sex drive, violence, selfishness, but also some of the better things in life like nurturing your offspring, mating, enjoying a good meal.

We take this Animal State, but pervert it with a concoction of mangled Law swirling like a self-important crust attempting to form around a vortex of chaos. All the while we’re proclaiming this is normal and correct, when nothing is static or accepted for more than a decade or two. Yes, yes some concepts like take care of your children and hmm… maybe there is a god or something, but those are archetypal, which is the part of human existence which changes the slowest if at all. I’ll be discussing those at a later date.

witches-wizards-4611 Let’s focus on Trump’s Make America great again. So that proposes we go back in time. 160 years ago it was legal to kill a slave. Is that when we were great and the laws were right? When Native Americans were cheated out of their land or killed. Did America rock then?

No of course not, but my point is those times were not too long ago and we had Laws some majority managed to get onto the books which we would think are insane now. I have a point, really I promise. So to assume. given our history, we are somehow 100% doing things right now is a belief only a fool could possess. Again, grasping at a point. Humans are a shit show. We need to get better, not go back, but what does this have to do with the boy walking by the gang versus the solo campers in some lonely canyon?

chaos-humans

Humans are a strange mix of Law and Chaos, we expect problems, but random chance, luck, and reason can solve an issue. You can’t talk your way out of a snakebite. The can’t verbally spare with a mountain lion. Bears can’t be bribed with money or favors. In doesn’t matter what your GPA is or if your brother runs the biggest gang in the area, if you fall off a cliff or get hypothermia. The challenges in nature are raw. It is the great equalizer. The real you faces them. Gone are awards, degrees, longevity at the workplace, your ability to wow people. The challenges big and small are met by you. The self you speak to at night and in the morning. No excuses, no mercy, you do it or it doesn’t get done. You stay safe or a Jesse Ventura said, “You lose it out here and you’re in a world of hurt.”

jesse-ventura-as-blain-in-predator-1987

So who wants to go camping with me next weekend?

Tune back in as I return to the southern desert and finish what I never started.

water-and-sand

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little-camp

WildernessPunk Camp 4

My Coyote Buttes morning is cut short when I discover a hidden motion detector near the majestic pools of water. I had just learned how the rangers use these to e-patrol back country areas where someone has decided people shouldn’t be allowed to enter. Funny I spotted it, not so funny that it makes me paranoid within one of my favorite places in the world to be and I blast out of there earlier than I would have. I guess when you wake up at 4:30am it’s easy beating even the rangers out the door.

coyote-buttes

It becomes comic how many things I rush through doing on my return to Flagstaff. Gas, grub, quick visit to camp 1, Jeremy’s place for ice, storage unit, camp out shopping, and then finally Downtown to jack into the web, but more importantly charge my limited tech. I’ll have two laptops at once for the rest of the week, won’t be a big deal save when I’m camping and I’ll be able to double up on my writing this one time.

cyberhead

It is still well shy of three before I take my, for a short time only, wheels out to the Lilly Ponds (Camp 2). As the dregs of Labor Day Weekend’s campers linger and head out, I eventually grab the Kurt Camp and settle in. However, just as I sit and start writing for the much neglected Daily Discord, I am assaulted by micro-mosquitoes. People complain and brag over how large their mosquitoes are, but at least you can see them. These Arizona buggers are the size of a nail head and remain difficult to spot.

I am forced to retreat to my tent and just as I enter I hear heavy machinery drowning out the male Elk’s bugling. I finish the article and wind down and it stops at sunset.

I wake up early again, but the darkness and cold has been trying to force my road weary bones to grab another hour, which I do. As I stir, I hear more machinery. At the Lilly Ponds, what a fucking crime.

So these lackeys are thinning the forest or as I call it, uglification. So now even the forest has to be controlled and orderly. What will they do next, tear up all the trees so they can be re-planted in neat rows? I understand we have to protect the rich people that are lucky enough to live out in nature from nature (I speak of forest fires here)

I might be going out on a soggy half broken limb, but in most cases the people that make the most money do it on the backs of others and at the price of natural resources. They rape the land for a few decades and what is their reward, they get to live on a huge pristine piece of land. Still, this isn’t enough for them. They may enjoy the natural and beautiful trees in their own yard, but the forest around them is chopped to pieces so a forest fire won’t reach their second summer homes.

fuckers

Excuse me for a moment, I need to go toss my throwing knife about six hundred times.

Okay, I feel better. So yeah, I am obviously forced to move. I take down my camp, which thankfully only takes a few minutes and before the sun graces this part of the earth, I’m already on my way.

I take a road at random heading deeper into the forested canyon. This becomes a good thing as I explore forests free of any signs of humanity, save for the road that grows rougher at each smaller branch I take.

After seeing a herd of deer, I spy a saddle dipping between two hills to my right. Beside it there appears to be a long abandoned mining camp. Welcome to WildernessPunk Camp 4. And as I write this I look up to see a lone male antelope, which is the fastest mammal in the US. We make eye contact, which doesn’t break for a full minute. Then he flies off, racing down the forested hills like a white ghost in the wind.

antelope

Antelope in there uh I can’t see it either

I really like it here. Besides being new for me. I feel more remote than just about anywhere I’ve camping around Flagstaff. I guess we’ll see what the night may bring.

***

It is interesting what a huge deal having a vehicle makes even when one doesn’t have a preponderance of gear. It’s something we campers could fail to appreciate and often don’t absorb the importance of. Backpackers get closer to the heart of this, but even they have a ride that gets them to the very edge of where they wish to go. If a person left their house to go backpacking and walked twenty miles to the trail head before they started the real hike, I would consider them in a different league.

I’m not saying that car camping can’t be burly for I’ve run into some intense and serious situations while car camping such as, having to chase a giant cougar off, camping in grizzly country, having my ride axle out in the mud and almost getting hypothermia when a snow storm hit, and being attacked by a rabid bobcat to name just a few. But humor me for a moment as we review the differences between car camping and um… mountain bike camping.

first-new-fire-pit-in-a-while

First New Fire Pit in a while

First off, you can obviously go further car camping and arrive clean as you step out of your air-conditioned vehicle. Also consider how much you can bring. You don’t even have to be choosy. “Oh, maybe I’ll use the grill, but I might want to use the camp stove, better bring both.” (Funny I’m writing this since I have neither) With bike camping or on foot, you’re lucky if you can bring a tent and a sleeping bag. Hell, I leave both of those at camp 1 and have a monstrously heavy backpack on the way in and out.

Another big obvious is a cooler, along with ice and yep, beer. With car camping you can bring two coolers if you like and most of us do. With bike camping maybe a sixer, a tab of ice, but a shitty fabric cooler at best. “Oh, crap did I need to save room for the food?” Also let’s not forget about the wonders of having a camp chair.

So yes, having these wheels for a few extra days has been a luxury and an unexpected blessing. Like always, having a vehicle makes everything about six times easier. However, it does distract a little from the truer wilderness experience and living closer to the edge. Don’t worry I’ll try to not let it go to my head before I have to return it this weekend, but boy this cooler full of ice cold beer and fried chicken is damn nice.

azsunset

Turn back in as I return to the southern desert and finish what I never started.

cybersexy

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